I was truly enthralled by this glorious, powerful and artistic rhetorical commercial for Old Spice Swagger.  Just the intense tone the principle actor employs in his delivery of the script stole my heart and sent me to the store on a mad-hunt for this product!  It's completely illogical, but 100% credible because there's an NFL Superstar rockin' the scene!  I consider this video to be solid, flawless rhetoric!  Huzzah!

Barren Pews

            I remember the day.  All seemed normal, the sun shining through the window.  But I could sense some dark, undercutting atmosphere permeating the peaceful morning rays.  My mother sat my siblings and I down; she had something to share.  That was the day she told all. I never guessed my cousin was sporting a false, deceptive facade.  What had been his snare?  Those detrimental substance abuse addictions, the agents of which affliction were drugs and alcohol.  The one I had looked up to admiringly, now fallen and stripped from any sort of peace in religion due to the far too common subservience to natural temptations and tendencies of man, regained a skewed reputation. Had he really been on the road to recovery like he externally exuded?  No, and had he begun again to actively participate in church?  No.  And miserable experiences were his fruits.

            In the modern world in which we live, a dangerously high and diverse plethora of alternatives stand in stout opposition to the role of religion in conservative American society, especially among youth.  When did my cousin begin engaging in immoral, degrading behavior?  Teenage years.  The youth of modern society are attacked, and after yielding to  intense secular pressures, often retain zero desire to adhere to religious morals and principles taught impersonally by pastors and preachers.  They're bombarded while in their growing, impressionable and vital adolescent years with numerous concourses of choices to make, and what to believe, and how.  Without some measure of hopeful, inspiring religious activity, youth can seriously dive off cliffs into vicious water. The drugs and alcohol abuse that rampage throughout society and contribute to many of its major problems, also assist in tearing and keeping youth in America down and away from worship pews, thus decreaing our nation's church attendance among young adults.  

Annotated Bibliography

1.  Fawcett, Bruce G.; Francis, Leslie J.; Linkletter, Jody; Robbins, Mandy.  "Religiosity and Alcohol Avoidance..."  Journal of Youth Ministry.  10-1-12.  http://web.a.ebscohost.com/ehost/detail/detail?vid=39&sid=28d1943e-750c-492e-afd0-14876931432b%40sessionmgr4001&hid=4109&bdata=JnNpdGU9ZWhvc3QtbGl2ZSZzY29wZT1zaXRl#db=aph&AN=82666780

            Summary:  This article is primarily about the use of alcohol and drugs among youth as it limits their capacity to function properly.  When it becomes an addiction, as it frequently does among the rising generations, it can have serious, negative repercussions.  Under the binding influence of abused substances, all that they can think about, all that they can desire is that drug or that chug of mind-numbing drink.  Whatever resources, whatever skills they have our buried in the obsession for one thing; suffice to say, very dangerous.  Therefore, religion is a complete and utter absent priority from their disturbed lives, and they increase the lack of youth attending church.  Productivity levels steep, and their ability to socially engage in activities, or organizations, like church, are lofty ambitions. However, on a brighter note, church affiliation can assist youth in quitting involvement with harmful material, and restore them to wellness, spiritually and physically.

            Evaluation :  I most surely can incorporate this information and material into the body of my paper, used to strengthen my claims.  The use of alcohol and drugs are evidently awful influences if one desires to be strongly involved and planted in their faith.  If there is the replacement, the distraction and the corruption that stems from the degrading, excessive consumption of potentially ruining substances in an adolescent's life, there is no room left for church.  It's sad to know just how common the exposure to harmful substances at a younger and younger age; perhaps many of our other problems and troubles with families, education, work and safety are tied to this skewing of the moral compass that addiction brings.  Instead of being dedicated to smoking, sipping, or injecting, they can find joy and relief in adopting and learning the values and principles of a religious faith.

            Criticism:  There is no lack of abundance of information and statistical evidence from various reports and groups of the article, and leans heavily on the way of how church helps addicted individuals relinquish their desires for drugs and alcohol.  One thing I believe the author should have spent time focusing on just exactly why kids have the desire in the first place to depart from traditional values, and waywardly commence substance abuse.

 2.  Benda, Brent; Corwyn, Robert.  "Religiosity and Church Attendance..."  International Journal for the Psychology of Religion.  10-1-2000.  http://web.b.ebscohost.com/ehost/detail/detail?vid=6&sid=9ad6c6cd-3745-4be1-9a61-ac01026aaac3%40sessionmgr112&hid=118&bdata=JnNpdGU9ZWhvc3QtbGl2ZSZzY29wZT1zaXRl#db=aph&AN=4817854

            Summary:  There is little regard to religion and its influence in society's youth nowadays.  Kids are just told to go to Church because they hear their parents forcing them  to at a young age, and therefore commence attendance for all the wrong, unwilling reasons.  They begin to see church as a burden rather than a service with which they are deeply attached, like some teenage alluring program, activity they were actually interested in.  Alternatives that don't pressure them, judge them, or try to control their behavior like experienced in younger years through attending church, easily override and take the place of religiosity in their lives.  Another "gain" that they might feel that results from frequent church appearances, just 'showing up', not intending to learn or participate in any way, will secure them points for eternal salvation in Heaven, when that's not at all how it works!  Church attendance does not, then, when presented and instilled in this manner, help minimize drugs/alcohol exploits in rebellious, freedom-seeking teenagers.  What really helps regulate and diminish "hard drug" use is a personal involvement and desire to learn about particular faiths in America.

            Evaluation:  I think this article is also a super fantastic resource for developing my major, central idea and angle of my issues paper.  Just the wise point is brings up about how when kids feel forced to go to church, their desire to actually be there and open their hearts and minds to learning is negatively affected, and so succumbing to that first drug or bottle of beer is all the easier, and morally neutral.  I think it's important also to understand that regardless of the family, or community, or culture, if not cared for with correctness,  religion can become buried and stamped out in the chain of importance.  Then the evil substances have greater chance to distract the adults and their youth from high moral, conservative values.

            Criticism:  First off, to clear some murky water, the whole article was based chiefly off of a single city study and observation, which really doesn't help to validate the results and the findings of these authors.  Also, the other outcome of church attendance could have been inserted into the church healing aspect; they said personal reconciliation and study with God  was the best way to limit drug use, but teachers and lessons from church cannot be the only connection  to exterminating all darkness within a group of people.

3.  Dudley, Roger; Mutch Patricia; Cruise, Robert.  "Religious Factors and Drug Usage..."  Journal for the Scientific Study of Religion.  06-1-87.  http://web.b.ebscohost.com/ehost/detail/detail?vid=3&sid=7ffc3b53-0cf7-4658-a465-9da658b219e4%40sessionmgr198&hid=106&bdata=JnNpdGU9ZWhvc3QtbGl2ZSZzY29wZT1zaXRl#db=aph&AN=4897397

            Summary:  This article for me is more outdated, but provides an interesting slice into this issue as it arouse heavily in the past.  A study was done among North American Seventh Day Adventist Youth to monitor or set out the correlations between their religious faith and use of drugs and alcohol.  They present drugs as being a major enemy to devout religious practice and application of standards into one's life, but say alcohol isn't as greatly condemned by some American Christian denominations.  Religious parents, a personal zealousness in church activity and attendance serve as a defense against a lifetime of misery caught up in "immoral" addictions.  Those that are caught, however, struggle to attend church.

            Evaluation:  The effects of both drugs and alcohol still stand, especially when abused by youth.  Even if abstinence is the primary goal, and aversion the key moral, if adolescents slip or have bad influences surrounding their impressionable minds,  they can fall away from converted congregations and into precarious, unhealthy paths.  This puts not only their spiritual salvation on the line, but their ability to contribute to family life, their community, and society in general.

            Criticism:  From what I read, this article does a very nice job of presenting both possibilities of the alcohol/drug usage among their group of studiers.  They do acknowledge it is only Seventh Day Adventists they're studying, and another sketchy component is that the article was  published in 1987.  So, kinda outdated, but they still can be used for a historical support for my paper.   

4.   Kinnaman, David.  "Americans Divided on the Importance of Church".  Barna Group.  3-25-14.  https://www.barna.org/barna-update/culture/661-americans-divided-on-the-importance-of-church#.VQAHIPnF-Sr

            Summary:  This document/web page does an excellent job of addressing some of the general, broad questions that initially crop up when the issue of religion and youth in America is introduced to a group.  Through utilization of visual charts, Venn diagrams, and other trendy displays, statistical data in regards to surveying on the big questions are presented.  One of the line graphs about "Do you attend Church?" distinguishes Millennials from Americans, and it's plain to see that the percentages for Millenials former attending church nowadays is far less, only around 25%, over the past decade, pretty consistently.  Also, almost 60% of Millenials growing up in the church, or that did, will drop out eventually, especially with prodigal rebelliousness in teenage years, or the acceptance of drug s and alcohol.

            Evaluation:  Most assuredly, for the setting portion at the front end of my paper, I'm going to want to include strong, undisputable statistics such as these, to really bolster my credibility and set a sure, trustworthy foundation for the remainder of the paper.  Those attending church claim they need God in their lives, that hope and light, which is very true, and the counter-argument to that also is strong; those who have drugs and alcohol filling in the spiritual desires of their soul have no need to go to Church.  If we can better protect and warn the youth of today bout the long-term effects of their choices concerning health, then many will be protected, and many more preserved in the precious pews.

            Criticism:  Of course, not everyone can always b fully satisfied.  I would have liked to see even more, and even diverse questions posed and answered through statistical data, but not every question can be appeased.  And some of the sub-topics were analyzed in longer text after their visual display, but some had nothing.

5.    Solas, Marc.  "Top 10 Reasons our Kids Leave Church".  Blog.  2013.  http://marc5solas.com/2013/02/08/top-10-reasons-our-kids-leave-church/

            Summary:  This article gives the author's top 10 reasons why youth aren't as fully attendant at church as they could be.   I won't list them all, but there are a few pertinent ones to my specific topic.  One of them is competition; church services suffer competition on Sunday, with other affiliations people have discovered today (possibly addiction serving?).  They bring up" phony advertising", that everyone is totally accepted and welcomed into their congregation, and yet when a druggie or alcoholic arrive, they're treated lower, and feel super harshly judged by others in attendance.  How can youth ever feel comfortable trying to return to church if they're not going to feel the love, the encouragement of his brothers and sisters there, seeing him who he can become.

            Evaluation:  It's a great article, and launches me into a series of many great ideas surrounding the heart of my issue.  I can use them as reference points, and then run with my further analyzing and ideology, as seen just up above.  I find it super enthralling the idea that churches can be so caught up, too, in trying to make themselves 'approved' by the modern world, that everyone will feel at ease in the walls.  If a church is patterned off of the way the world is now, there would not even be any sort of holiness there.  It's all super corrupt and unjust.  Good, solid churches reach out and help bring others up to their level, in nurturing, caring ways, with charity, but many churches descend to the substance abusers level, and have nowhere to go--they've sunk themselves.

            Criticism:  Of course, there are points key to this issue that weren't part of his list of ten, but it's his opinion, and he's a seasoned scholar, so I respect that.  What really could be fixed though is that with a couple of his points there's hardly any elaboration or explanation, in comparison to huge chunks of commentary for all the others, and this makes me feel like he didn't feel as strongly or passionately about those, and just included them to get to 10.

Rhetorical Analysis Reflection and Thesis

                For me, the article that was most persuasive, or the one that impacted me the most both emotionally and logically, and regarding the credibility of the author, proved to be "American Justice and Divine Mercy: Thoughts on Osama Bin Laden's Death", by Patrick Clark.  Therefore, his is the article I have selected to be the very core and focus of my rhetorical analysis paper.

            After researching a bit about his background, I discovered The author, Patrick Clark, to be a professor of theology at the private Catholic University of Notre Dame, and a writer for the Catholic Moral Theology Blog.  Christian values of courage, martyrdom, and human fulfillment provide the basis for his works and teachings, and how living a moral Christian life reflects our worship of God.  Fantastic!  He's obtained a professional background in the ideals he presents in his piece about the ethics and the extent of mercy and justice in regards to celebrating the execution of Osama Bin Laden. 

            I find his ideas of death and mercy to be most persuasive, in that he talks about how, despite the horrible deeds that this corrupt leader performed on earth, he's still a man and spirit, and the extinction of a fellow being shouldn't be cause for rejoicing.  Sure, while he hurt many people, and probably deserved what came to him, we should consider Christ's sufferings and death for all of us, and extend more mercy and compassion for victims of justice.  I just feel like he's got a real strong, effective argument for his intended Christian audience.  It hits my heart strings and provokes the internal questioning of my morals.  In Patrick Clark's article about the variables of justice and divine mercy, and the obligation of the Catholic community to retain greater mercy and forgiveness in acts of justice, he utilizes unfailing rhetorical devices and powerful literary tools to present and concentrate his argument.

            I'll take the approach of appraising Clark's solid elements of writing fused into the piece, particularly the ethological and pathological strengths.  His ability to sufficiently demonstrate and elaborate on his beliefs and use allusions to Christ's execution also bolstered his claim.  It isn't all just points emphasizing the correctness of his stance on the issue, but the author presents opposing evidence to his article, which I believe increases his credibility.  However, there are a few setbacks and areas for improvement in this article, which I'll identify and discuss, like the more narrow appeal and the controversial defense against the choice to kill Bin Laden, supporting the side of a higher level of morality and doctrine; forgiving all because Christ suffered for all, and loving our enemies.

Faith in America

            Mitt Romney's speech of 2007, given at the George Bush Presidential Library was truly inspirational, and effective.  His whole purpose in raising his voice that night was to dispel any fear that might have been held about him influencing politics with LDS affairs, and doctrinal oppressiveness, but also, at the same time, to reinforce the strong, committal ideal that America should acknowledge God as our Provider of liberty, our Protector.  There still should be a separation of Church and State, but that common respect and love for our Creator that was held even by the Founding Fathers of our nation should not vanish in the secular world.

            The ethos side of this article is very strong for Governor Romney.  He knows about politics for sure, seeing as how he's served as the governor of Massachusetts and done extremely well there in his preservation of Constitutional values and laws.  Never before has an excessive inclusion of Mormon doctrine negatively affected his stewardship, and leadership, and yet he never discredits the faith in God that upholds America.  After being questioned by his faith, he always told how it helps him in his position, not a detriment.  People can trust him because he presents the cause of uniting the citizens more, common cause supporter, and that religious freedom should be for all.

            His employment of pathos is fantastic.  Complimenting the president and the government to begin is always nice and flattering, while delving into the strength of the country and the generations who have fought valiantly in the past and present for our liberty.  People desire to belong, to be connected and yet free, which Romney strongly believes; we should have common morals to protect, and everybody should be respected in their own right.  The many lives laid down in sacrifice for American liberty is a tender, passionate reminder of his love for the soldiers and the duty he feels towards honoring these sacred emblems of the U.S.  He emphasizes the need for love of neighbor, service to nation, just being Christ-like.

            Logos is also evident in this great speech.  He points out the past's defeat of fascism an Soviet Union as being a feat of the great generation, and the issues that America faces now, and how they need to be aware and willing to fight equally as hard as their predecessors.  Also, religion-wise, he mentions the Founding Fathers reverence and love for God.  We have many faiths in this country, and that's good, we should stand on common ground of preventing a national religion of secularism.  We've had long journeys before for our freedom, and we need to be willing to fight now.

             

Opinion Editorial Reflection

            Initially, I was tentative about the opinion editorial assignment, almost as if it were a new menu item at the burger grill that had great advertisements, but in actuality tasted really awful.  The whole concept of the paper sounded scrumptious--creating your own ideas, expressing your own personal convictions pertaining to a specific area of interest--, but the tedious, redundant nature of the writing/drafting process proved to not be all peaches and roses.  It consumed hours, focused concentration, excavation into the deep creative caverns of the mind, a considerable expenditure of mental energy.  Despite these rigorous qualities, however, it was a healthy, growth-promoting task, and one very satisfying to conquer.

            I began the whole assignment, after the idea and thesis/supportive reason proposal, by constructing my paper through a random spill of ideas.  Basically, any thought or idea that cropped up in the garden of my mind, I jotted down into the meat of the paper.  After all my surface creativity was spent, I confronted the scattered ideas and organized them according to their proper topic sentence pertinence.  Then the editorial started to take shape, and have meaning and purpose, not just a jumbled vat of unconnected thoughts.  Eventually, the first, rough body of the paper was completely hewn, and offered up for peer/teacher review.  Of course, it was pocked with frequent imperfections, of which I was the head reviser of.  I added, cut, rearranged, slimmed, bulked, and polished the paragraphs to produce a cleaner, more powerful piece.  Thus, the final draft eased forth into literary existence.

            I definitely employed certain tools and tactics in the writing style of my article.  One thing that I certainly love is creative, descriptive language and story-telling, and, since I focused my ideas greatly upon the outdoors, I wrote about specific places or scenes in nature that I've enjoyed, and the feelings attached thereto.  I just hoped that these detailed digressions would foster welcoming avenues that pulled audience readers into the paper, and kept them happy to be rolling along.  Another device I used was to include logical, evidential points about how being outside and doing those hearty activities provides legit health benefits, mentally and physically.  I also mentioned the social and spiritual consequences of prolonged indoor existence.  I also hoped that the interspersed scriptural references, general conference/movie quotes would bolster my argument.  I tried to use as much authority in my writing, and boldness as seemed appropriate and effective.

            I felt that I could've improved in a couple various areas.  My own personal experiences and growth with getting to know and appreciate the beauty and power of nature haven't been limited to only scouts or family trips, but also were due greatly in part to sports.  I failed to mention those uplifting adventures.  Also, I feel like, even after some revision, I completely discredited and shunned the modern-age technology, which really does have some good benefits.  In fact, if it weren't for my laptop, I wouldn't enjoy the privilege of writing my papers conveniently, or being able to quickly message my family or friends in far-off places.  Lastly, I should have found more of the true, impressive statistics that correlate with my desired message; there's lots of good stuff out there, but I didn't really look into that realm too extensively.   

Style Academy's Got Style!

Introduction to Sentence Combining

Well, the first exercise led me to write something like this:

            In order to join the category of people who become highly creative and productive, we must learn to acknowledge, embrace, and even explore and derive educational enrichment from our failures.

In the second exercise, I produced t­his series of sentences:

            My feet went out of sight in the late 1990's due to my failing vision, which predicament led me to set an appointment with an eye doctor in Paris; he sent me off to buy some glasses following a series of affirmative tests.  At the store, I still couldn't see completely clearly, which fact I'd like to blame my choice of frames on.  Although neither excuse holds truth or validity, I'd like to say they were forced upon me.  In the end, I personally selected a pair that I believed increased my intellectual and international appearance.  The frames were constructed with dark plastic and rectangular lenses that weren't much larger that weren't much larger than my eyes.  I felt a strange sense of familiarity about the glasses, but I failed to exactly pinpoint its source.  After I picked them up, I spent a great deal of time in front of the mirror, pretending to share intelligent comments in regards to the state of Europe.

Introduction to Sentence Imitation

For this tutorial's first exercise, they had me copy their sentence verbatim:

            Sometimes, according to Edwin Teale, a gall gnat larva, which does not resemble the adult in the least, and which has certainly not mated, nevertheless produces within its body eggs, live eggs, which then hatch within its soft tissue.

Then the next exercise required my own sentence, but structurally identical to theirs:

            Occasionally, according to the scriptures, a faithful sheep, which resembles a member of the Church, and which is not likely to fall away from the faith, nevertheless suffers a plethora of temptation of the flesh, strong temptations, which can be overcome through the power of Christ.

Lastly, there was a suggested paragraph that we were told to imitate in our own original way:

            [Original]  There's nothing better that students can take home over summer vacation than a sense that what they have learned last year has meant they were able, with the help of lots of other people, including the alienated girl with the green hair and that kid who counts on his fingers, and lots and lots of people beyond the walls of the school, to make something important happen, to meet a challenge.

            [Revised by me]  Nothing is quite as enjoyable that runners can take home from a cross country race over the rest of the Saturday than a sense that what they achieved in an intense, 18-minute course has meant that they were able, with encouragement from every direction, including the long-haired friendly runner and the fierce green-jersey runner, and hordes of jeering spectators lining the avenue of the 5K track, to achieve something fantastically rigorous, to triumph over this physical challenge.

Reflection

            I really feel that the Style Academy website is very fantastic, and beneficially useful for improving and developing as a writer, and my writing style.  I appreciate the numerous available tutorial videos posted on the site, wherein are clear, comprehendible explanations of the different aspects of writing.  Embedded within these videos are awesome moments to pause the streaming and work on our own exercises.  This keeps me engaged and more focused on the content of the video; I'm compelled to learn from what is being taught.  I found it interesting also the different categorized techniques employed by the site's authors, which they believe are the most advantageous for this concept of learning to write better.  They talked about imitating those authors and devices used which we highly favor to better our own voice; we are influenced by the writing we invest our time and minds in.  And sentence combining is very thought provoking and mind expanding in that it forces me to consider the multiple ways I could possibly phrase something.

            The exercises and assignments are great sources for practicing, re-working and growing as a writer; some of the examples given that we are to combine or imitate or easier, while others are more abstruse and suggest stepping back from an initial approach and tackling the combining, imitating goal from a new variant angle or perspective.